This is not April Fool's Day.

See my "Mad as hell" post below. This is not a joke. Read for yourself...and weep:

Ashlee Simpson has trumped Rod Stewart by landing the second US Billboard Top 200 No. 1 of her career this week.The pop featherweight bows in with "I Am Me", the follow up to 2004's "Autobiography" to lead a number of veteran acts into the top ten, reports Nielsen SoundScan/Billboard.

I find it interesting that Simpson, who is all of 20 years old, uses such introspective titles for her albums. Autobiography. I am me. This is apparently to hammer home the struggle that has characterized her life. And in her defense, I can only imagine the stress involved when you're not only selling millions of albums, but expected to actually fucking sing when people pony up a hundred bucks to see your sorry ass perform "live."

About a week from now, Ashlee Simpson will receive the first of many royalty checks to come for her album "I am me." It will likely be well into the six-figures. She'll celebrate by spending more on an evening-long bash than you or I earn in a year. Remember that when you're paying 50% more for natural gas this winter. As you sit huddled in front of the fire, thermostat turned down to 50 degrees, just remember that somewhere, Ashlee Simpson is deciding which $1,000 Coach handbag to buy, and sister Jessica will remind her "You can afford both, silly" and they'll titter and giggle and stop for even bigger implants on the way home, and ain't life in America just grand!